Facing My Fears

Hey Lovies! Your girl is TERRIFIED! Since being intentional about all things concerning me, I have had this sense of fear that keeps trying to attach itself to me and my dreams (not going to happen!). God has not given me the spirit of fear and I refuse to let my fear of failing be the reason I simply do not try. I am someone who does not like the unknown, I mean nobody does really but when I am not completely in control I self sabotage anything that does not feel familiar and comfortable to me. I start to get anxious and I began to fill my mind with all of these negative thoughts, until they completely consume me to the point where I do nothing. Because I am aware of how I roll when I feel myself getting to this point I instantly cancel it out. I remind myself of how far I come and not only that but where I’m going and suddenly I no longer feel anxious but driven.

As some of you may know, I am currently in the process of enrolling in school to become a traveling nurse * inserts bougie sashay here. When I originally started school many, many years ago lol, I wanted to be an OB-GYN, I held on to that dream for so long because I had told all of my friends & family about how much I wanted to become a doctor and their excitement Is what pushed me. But as you know depending on someone else’s drive and support will only push you so far. There will come a time when you have to decide what you want to do for your own life, not what’s going to look and sound good to your friends & family.

Fast forward to today, I no longer want to be a doctor, but my desire to be in the medical field is stronger than its ever been. I feel that a traveling nurse is most fitting to the lifestyle I want and my dreams. I am so excited about this new journey I’m embarking on to the point that it is scaring the living crap out of me, but your girl is going to push through and do exactly what she says she’s going to do.

This time around I’m doing it for me.

Y U D I N E